Lazy

I can’t believe how lazy I’ve been, not in general just with the blog.  Outside the world of the interweb, which I find myself withdrawing from more and more everyday, I’ve been non stop.  I have work up at the Weston Bolling gallery, was shown with the PAC gallery at the Bridge Art fair in New York City, and I’ve been planning a wedding.  Oh yes on top of that I managed to save my conservation technician job at the museum by doing a good job and making the right friends … I love when things work out like that.  Also I have a grad school interview on the 23rd at Cranbrook Academy of Art (wish me luck).  Half of me is hoping that I don’t get into Cranbrook’s program, but I also hate myself for thinking that.  The plan (with Tim’s blessing) is that if I get in Tim and I will push off the wedding until I graduate.  If I don’t get in the wedding is going to be Sept/Oct 2010 and at the moment I’m ready to walk down to the court house tomorrow.  I think it is because I’m scared.  Cranbrook is a lot of debt for me, and my debt is going to be Tim’s debt.  Besides that, the program is so amazing it scares me.  As stupid as it sounds I see the students in that program and think to myself that I’ll never be that good or that educated.  I want to crawl into my shell and just become Mrs. Ebeling and start a family, buy a house, and be a house mouse… but I know that that will not keep me happy.  But alas I’m complaining and Tim is sleep talking.  I need to grow some balls for this interview.